The Community of Weaver Bay
Image Courtesy of Google Maps
We're sorry, but due to current conditions worldwide and a desire to protect our town from
unclean people, Weaver Bay is temporarily closed. We simply can't tell who has washed their
hands and who hasn't, and until society in general comes to an agreement that washing hands
is good, and the Karen's of the world that insist we can't tell them what to do, and who
demand extensive, indisputable, non-partisan research is done to determine the one true brand
of hand soap that we all must use, we're simply keeping all of you out for now ... because, you
never know who's a Karen.
Therefore, until such time as the current conditions have passed, Agnes has been temporarily furloughed
from her position at the toll booth on Route 67, and the change sock has been taken down. The mountain pass
into Upper Bay is now patrolled with wild dogs and a few racoons on leashes, and bear traps have been
randomly laid around the golf course. Ferry service now requires proof of residency, the harbor is mined,
and the bay itself is continually patrolled by armed boats which you do NOT want to mess with.
We look forward to welcoming you back to Weaver Bay, "Time Magazine's 37th Most Picturesque Place to Live,"
at such time as the current crisis has abated.