Do you like retro? 'Cause we've got retro! This house defies all conventions of time (and occasionally three-dimentional physics, but more on that later) to create that unique, homey feel of another era while still maintaining a certain timeless sophistication and charm about it.
Let's start with that great room, a combination sunken living room and dining room with an attached study that can be left open to give the room a grander feel, or shuddered off for private moments, like a good hearth-to-heart with one of your children.
The spacious kitchen is the highlight of the house, done in a tasteful, understated pea green and orange motif with authentic 1960's hunter green appliance reproductions that, believe us, are not easy to come by. You'll spend many mind-numbing hours enjoying coffee in your mid-century tulup chairs, wishing you had made better life decisions.
The family room is another treasure with two fold-out sleeper couches with quilt coverings and laminate table with pleather-covered mid-century barrel chairs. The highlight however is the immaculate polyester deep shag carpet and authentic plyboard wood paneling in imitation oak.
Three spacious bedrooms can be found on the upstairs floor, contrary to the fact that the house is obviously a single story in the exterior photograph. The two smaller bedrooms are joined by a full bath, which presumably isn't the only one in the house, but we're hard-pressed to figure out where the other ones are as the house seems to subtly shift its layout every year or so.
Another great highlight of the house is the spacious, fenced-in back yard. The inexplicable complete lack of direct sunlight keeps the porch cool all year around, despite the total absence of shade or shadows of any kind. To compensate for this, all of the plants and trees are obviously fake, and the lawn is made of a high-quality polymer astro turf that will never need mowing and always looks pristine.